When commenting to Ralph in our usual Friday email exchange that Dawn has once again shrunk another one of my Tee shirts Ralph responded with this advice. The only advice I can give to restore matrimonial bliss and fairness is to bung all of her knickers in a boil wash when she’s out. This way she’ll think her arse etc. is getting fat as her arse thighs and belly bulges over the elastic. After letting her know that you’ve noticed too, and that although you love her dearly, you have to say that you think she’s getting a bit porky and undesirable. She’ll then go on a strict diet, save you money on having to feed her as much and she’ll have a nice tight pert arse for your pleasure... Result!